Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
When did angry sex become our thing?
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
