You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
try to milk me bitch
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