Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
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