The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
