You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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