i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
