hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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