I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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