I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Randomize
