sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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