it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
