You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
