its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
