whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
