Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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