It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Randomize
