not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
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