what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize