In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Randomize