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• (732): View more from New Jersey

  used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.

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• (919): View more from North Carolina

  he just said he'd buy the porn

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  its a step up from the last guy

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• (602): View more from Arizona

  you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!

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• (209): View more from California

  She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.

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• (254): View more from Texas

  In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.

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• (631): View more from New York

  I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.

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• (509): View more from Washington

  I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension

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• (901): View more from Tennessee

  I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.

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• (907): View more from Alaska

  We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"

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• (860): View more from Connecticut

  Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.

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• (716): View more from New York

  oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear

  (1-716): View more from New York

  The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear

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• (540): View more from Virginia

  Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off

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• (616): View more from Michigan

  Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me

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• (773): View more from Illinois

  Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?

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