Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
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