I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Randomize
