I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
