This girl is more easily done than said...
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize