She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
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