Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
