it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
I got her a Nickelback box set.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Randomize