I'm drive I can fine osifer
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize