I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize
