Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
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