Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
