BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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