I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize
