Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Be still, my beating vagina.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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