awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
and you fell through a lawn chair
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize
