You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Randomize
