He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Randomize
