Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
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long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
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