Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize
