please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Randomize
