Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
Then you guys just all showered together...?
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize