She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
