His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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