One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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