I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
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