At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
