You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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