Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Randomize
