Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
