This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Randomize
