Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
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